In certain wellness circles I’ve often heard words used that are associated with war. Gaslighting, trigger, weaponize, attack and demonise are to name a few. Punchy words used to create animosity and amplify polarity among diverse groups. It gets everyone into a fight of differences instead of celebrating them and seeking similarities irrespective of what sets us apart. This would be the opposite of encouraging community and togetherness.
Words hold power and agency. They influence, connect and colour our daily lives. Linguists would tell you that language is rooted in culture or intertwined. In the workplace, we use words in a manner to create comprehension and cohesion between different cultures, interpretation, disciplines, views and mental modules. If we are to use loaded words, it would set a tone of animosity and hostility. When we use our words to empower and instead become more conscious of the affect it has on others, then we are using words in a way that is kind towards the people that we message, converse or connect with. Reaching hearts and minds.
In fact, journalists make an ethical stance to be careful about the words used when sharing news with the public. It is the same for Communications and PR Experts. We can choose to sensationalise or we can choose honesty and to encourage or motivate the audience that we are serving.
I’d like to challenge you to think of the words you use daily as a leader, team leader or professional. Are you considering the impact that it has on those you talk or write to? Is it inclusive? Is it kind? Is it necessary? It is respectful?
We sometimes assume that because we are part of a minority in some way that we have the right to speak to other minorities in a derogatory way. This is normal in South Africa in certain parts of our country. However, as a multiracial descendent of the forcibly removed people of District Six, I find it offensive when others place me in a box constructed by Apartheid to limit and ostracize my community. An invalidation. A box that I have not myself associated or recognised other than it being painful and traumatic to those that I love. Four of my grandparents have been forcibly removed from the areas that they grew up in (District 6, Claremont and Simons Town) because of the colour of their skin. We have lost history, cultural and traditional keepsakes and memories because of the impact that the Group Areas Act of 1950 has had on my family and heritage. Something that I find hard to say: this happened to our people. This is where we come from. When where we come from, has been nullified and erased. Perhaps replaced with another version of Apartheid town planning. As if it had never happened. How do we share the rich culture of our people with generations not yet born?
Because of this, I often bring these nuanced conversations into the Diversity and Inclusion (D&I) trainings that I host. How we see ourselves, even in our community, is unique to who we are as individuals and should be respected as such. In SA, it is acceptable to joke about particular minority cultures openly but that does not make it right, fair, respectful or humane. Nor does it resonate with the ideology of Ubuntu.
I recently learnt about a situation of a man that identifies as LGBQ+ but easily projected his views of what it is to have breasts (having never transformed) on a cisgender woman. Essentially erasing her unique identity and narrative as a woman with breasts. We only see who we are. We need to see people as they see themselves, be open and objective to that unique experience and respectful about how others encounter life, circumstances and their distinct story.
If you are interested in Diversity and Inclusion training for a group of leaders, team or as a leader in need of D&I coaching, send an email to keri@keridavids.com to discuss my D&I offering.
